Transparency

By John T. Crestwell, Jr.
March 5, 2007

When I was a Christian, one of the reasons I believed in its tenets is because I had never heard a story like the story of Jesus… In fact, what you hear liberal theologians say is that he was the perfect revelation to human beings, spiritually, socially and ethically.

It was not until recent years that I found another story I could compare to the Jesus story. It is about a man I can honestly say is worthy of the title given to him-- “Mahatma” or “Great Soul” because his life is surely worthy of emulation. Mohandas Gandhi is who I am referring to…

I’ve decided to do more study on the life, beliefs, and teachings of Gandhi for the rest of the year and I hope to share with you more on his life in the weeks to come. Today, I want to focus on a very small part of his life that had a large impact socially. What I am referring to is Gandhi’s openness--his transparency. I am defining transparency as Webster defines it in the latter definitions as “easily understood; very clear; obvious; without guile or concealment; open.” Gandhi made it real simple—if you don’t have anything but the bear essentials there is nothing to hide, and this allows you to live mentally free from all the STUFF—the materialism that clouds your mental skies, which many times creates that competitive streak that, if it goes un-harnessed, can drive you mad and your greed may even cause you to cause many others pain. That’s not the part I want to focus on today. The part that relates to the message is where Gandhi felt we should live our lives as an open book—to be transparent—no secrets. You know, “What you see is what you get, or what you see is who I am in private and in public.” If I am a snake and shallow most of the time—what you see is what you get—that’s what I am. But if I am honest, loving and conscientious, then that is who I am-- and you can expect that when you see me or spend time with me… This is the simple way to explain Gandhi’s personal ethic. We know life is more complicated than this. This is a black/white ethic and as Unitarians we understand there is a huge shade of GRAY always present… I also understand that Gandhi was a Hindu, in a different culture and era, but you cannot help but see his belief as credible because somehow they carried a bruised, suppressed and oppressed nation to its independence and therefore, for me, they have merit and must be considered a guide for us.

Gandhi’s home was open to anyone. He had no secret investments or major possessions. In fact, when he died he left a pair glasses, sandals, a song book, and clothes he made himself, and that’s about it… When political, he did not sign secret Treaty’s with other nations. What he communicated in private he communicated in public. Many say he had no secrets.

Now most of us, from a pauper to a president, live with secrets. We have skeletons in the closet, and we prefer to keep the closet closed (amen). But one of the questions today is how can we change our personal lives and church lives in such a way that we are more open and honest about our feelings, hurts, desires, frustrations, ambitions, and the like, so that people really know who we are, where we want to go, and what we love and care about. Particularly us men who internalize so much stuff... I just spoke at Collington a few weeks ago–it is a retirement community and afterward we had lunch. I didn’t see any men and I asked one of the ladies, “Where are all the men?” She said, “DEAD!”... So you see. We’ve got to be more open. And how much better could our lives be if we could be more open, not holding back sharing who we are for fear of vulnerability? How much better could we be particularly in this community if we knew what was troubling our brothers and sisters so we can offer a word of support or a helping hand? Living a life that is transparent—more open-- I do believe, can make a difference.

I remember when I was in college at Hampton University in Virginia when and I met Sharon.. One day we were in photography class developing film. The entire class was singing the song “When We Get Married” an old tune… As I was singing, Sharon looked at me and said, “Are you talking to me?” I responded, “You know I’m going to marry you one day.” I was 20 years old what did I know? But I decided to give her a ride home in my trusty 1976 Volvo 242DL. When we got to her dorm she asked me, “So, what girl is sporting you around campus.” I said, “Uh… No girl is sporting me around campus except you.” That was good right? Well, what I didn’t say was that I had a girlfriend back at home 300 miles away. Did I lie? Sharon said “…girl on campus”, I didn’t have a girlfriend on campus (hello!) she was at home in Washington, DC. I LIED! And I felt so guilty day after day that I met Sharon one evening and confessed… I was afraid she would be done with me. She was upset and said to me as I left, “You need to go home and take care of your business…” Then she said, “See you later Mr. John Crestwell who has a girlfriend at home.” During thanksgiving break I went home and broke up with my girlfriend :).
But way back then I was afraid to be honest and open because I was worried about what Sharon was going to think or say. I was concerned that she would have walked away if I didn’t tell that little lie. There wasn’t too much harm done in this situation, but there are cases when one little lie can turn into many big lies! Have you ever been in that situation where you start out with an honest little lie and next thing you know it’s out of control and you can’t even control it anymore? Somebody knows what I’m talking about!

Being transparent means we examine our actions and ask the tough questions. And most of the time, we must ask those questions to ourselves, like: Am I hurting someone else with my actions? Or, am I justifying negative or destructive behavior? Is what I’m going to do going to tear down instead of build up? Will what I’m going to do create chaos or community? These are the questions we must ask ourselves.

When we are in church I believe the same rules apply. We should be an open and affirming ministry where honesty and openness are valued and affirmed.

One of our principles say that we believe in “…the right of conscience and the use of the democratic process within our congregations and in society at large”. I am focused on the second part of that principle right now—the democratic process… The word Democracy is derived from a Greek philosopher, Democritus, in the 3rd century BCE, who believed in the idea of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness (he had many writings on this), which is related to the modern idea of democracy which is when we treat people no matter their class the same—it’s the golden rule. More than that, it is an organization “of the people—run by the people” where folk get their concerns heard no matter how small or large. True Democracy asks that we be inclusive, open and transparent.
It might be easier if you are a leader to say, “This is how it goes or else!” But history has proven that dictatorships, theocracies may last long sometimes, but do not work very well in stabilizing a nation or building trust or creating peace and love in a community.

My point here is that in church we must seek to live out Gandhi’s principles by using the systems in place here at Davies to voice our joys and concerns. It makes no sense to me that if you are upset about something that you won’t use the many forms of communication by going to a committee, congregational meeting, contact the Board chair or contacting me, your minister. I want your voice to be heard and as a member of this congregation you deserve that.

When I met with the youth at the UUA’s Youth Council I was amazed how smoothly they ran their meetings. There structure is organized so that if they do not have consensus in the group, like the Quakers, they stay there and hash it out all night if necessary. Now the bad part is sometimes you get a bunch of young folk who like to filibuster at meetings and they can get to be long and cumbersome; but the good part is consensus really means consensus with them.
That is the type of ministry I expect here at Davies, not because I say so but because it is in keeping in line with our principles. Now, I thought that was the ministry we had but I keep hearing through the grapevine about some folks’ concerns. If you have a concern and not reporting it to the leadership, how can it be addressed? It’s an exercise in futility to just complain. In my neighborhood we call that gossip and that is poison to a ministry. If you are concerned in anyway let someone know who can deal with the issue.
Now I realize that I am opening myself and this ministry to perhaps many trivial concerns but I believe in the first part of that principle which says, “The right of conscience”. This means, to me, that Unitarian Universalists can gage a situation as worthy of mentioning or not. I trust your “concern meter”. I trust you know what is trivial and what is crucial. But what I trust more than that is your love for this church and that you will do things to build it up not tear it down.

Jean Smith emailed me and offered to assist with the development of our vision/mission statement which was an action item for me coming out of the congregational meeting. She gave me a handout with some good language to use and many of you many know, this is what I love–when people share concerns then offer a helping hand to get the job done. That is healthy ministry.

I received a call last night from Mark Berninghausen who is out of state. Sally gave him a CD of the “Standing on the Side” of love service. He called to say he was moved by the service and kept playing “We are a Gentle Angry People” over and over. He was even choked up leaving the message of how proud he was to be a Unitarian Universalist. It was a moving message. But I appreciate his affirmation, his call, and willingness to share his joy. This is what makes ministry wonderful. But I would also expect that if Mark was disgruntled about something he would call and feel this ministry was open enough to express his concerns. I would expect the same from you to.

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Copyright by Rev. John T. Crestwell. All rights reserved. Please contact him for permission to use.